Emily

12:30 pm.
I just got a call from a client, that she needs her hair done as soon as possible. Her daughter Emily, who is in her early 20's is brain dead and they are waiting for her organs to shut down.
Peggy wanted to make sure her hair was shaped up before the funeral, and had no idea how soon that would be. I've done Emily's hair at least 10 years. She's been dealing with an inoperable tumor on her spine since jr. hi. She's had multiple surgeries for different pain pumps, and been on pain meds for quite a while now. Every time she's told me that they've increased her morphine, I've wondered how long her body could handle that. As soon as I heard the message, I broke down and cried. Just knowing someone so long and seeing them in chronic pain is difficult to watch. I've tried to be patient each time she was in, because she would have a difficult time sitting in the chair for long periods. My patients is tested some times, when I’m just trying to get through my job, dealing with my own pain, although realizing, it’s nothing like she’s been experiencing. It’s difficult to understand what people are going through until you’ve experienced the same things.
11pm.
Beth cancelled her appt tonight because of a cold, so I was able to get Peggy in. She was so grateful, and thanked me profusely as if I had gone out of my way for her. I was trying to figure out how to help her out, since I had just made a commitment to my self to not take on too much extra. I need to give my self a break so I can continue working for the long haul. I’m trying to find some balance in my life. I asked Peggy what happened. They believe there was some mistake at the pharmacy. Emily was given the wrong dosage of medicine.
1000 times more than what the Dr. had ordered, even though the label was exactly what the Dr. had ordered. When retracing steps, someone remembered the pharmacist had questioned the amount, as if that wasn’t normal, and the Dr. said “NO” and verified the smaller dosage. They believe the pharmacist accidentally gave the dosage he had in his mind any way.
I cannot fathom that this is possible. I cannot fathom that they are waiting for their only child to die.
I feel pain for them but have no concept of what they must be going through.
I’m stunned and heartbroken.